Best Jokes This Week
Tourism is the next big thing. All countries are trying to attract more tourists. See the taglines.
Thailand: Amazing Thailand
India: Incredible India
Malaysia: Truly Asia
Australia: There’s nothing like Australia
Question: Have you ever wondered what the Pakistan’s tourism tag line would be??
Answer: Have a blast. It may be your last……
Professors Anant is well known for his sexist comments in class. One day, all of the blondes in the class gathered outside of the classroom and decided that the next time he made a sexist comment they would all walk out of the classroom.
The next day the Anant was talking and made another sexist statement as expected, "You ladies will be happy to hear that the nigerians have an average penis size of 12 inches."
With this all of the blondes walk out. He calls to them, "Girls! Wait! The next flight to nigeria doesn't leave for next few hours!"
In New York, man is going to jump off the building. Up rushes Anant to talk him down. He yells up to the man "Don't jump! Think of your father" Man replies "Haven't got a father; I'm going to jump." Anant goes through a list of relatives, mother, brothers, sister, etc. Each time man says "haven't got one; going to jump."
Desperate the Anant yells up "Don't jump! Think of Jes" Man replies "Who is that?" Cop yells "Jump, Muslim! You're blocking traffic!"
Anna and blonde are walking home from a night at the bar and have to pee, so they stop at a cemetery. With nothing to wipe with Anna uses her panties and the blonde uses a nearby wreath.
The next day anna's boyfriend calls his friend, "They are never going out again! Anna came home without panties!"
The other replies, "You think that's bad? My girlfriend came with a card in her crack that said, 'From all of us at the fire station, we will never forget you!'"
An American guy goes to Pakistan to get laid. He takes a girl from the street back to his hotel room. After the first round he asks her, "You finish?" She shakes her no.
They go for a second time and again he asks her, "You finish?" But again she shakes her head.
They do it a third time and he is exhausted at this point. He asks her, "You finish?"
She replies, "No, I'm Pakistani."
A young Pakistani goes to the store to buy a few things: a case of beer and a bag of chips. He goes to checkout and the lady cashier says "You must be single."
Paki asks her "You knew that from just what I'm buying?"
She replies "No, you're just really ugly."
A man is walking down the street and sees a beautiful paki woman with extremely large boobs. As he is passing her he asks, "If I gave you $100 could I touch your boobs?"
She is annoyed but after some persuiation she says okey. He enjoys it and then hesitates but asks at last. What's about screwing ?
Pakistani woman says - it will be 10 $. My usual charges.
Pakistaniwent to the doctor Anant because he could no longer get an erection. The doctor told him to bring his wife in. So the next day the man comes in with his wife. First, the doctor tells her, "Take off all of your clothes." So she does.
Next he tells her, "Now turn around... Okay, good. Now lie down." With this he pulls the man aside and tells him, "You are perfectly healthy. I didn't get a boner either."
The maid has just asked for a raise
Pakistani housewife: "Why do you think you deserve a raise?"
Maid: "I have three reasons. The first is that I cook better than you."
Mrs Paki: "Who told you that?"
Maid: "Your husband did. The second reason is that I clean better than you do."
Mrs. Paki: "Who told you that?"
Maid: "Your husband did. The final reason is that I am better in bed than you are."
Pakistani wife: "I suppose my husband said that too?!"
Maid: "No, the gardener."
Mrs. Paki: "How much do you want?"
A pakistani girl goes into the gynecologist Anant. When he asks her what the problem is she replies, "Something is extremely wrong. I keep finding postage stamps in my vagina!"
He takes a look and laughs, "Dear, those aren't stamps. Those are stickers from the bananas."
In streets of New York Anant and Pakistani were walking. Pakistani : You Americans are cowards. We Pakistani are brave. You know you are talking to a son of lion.
Anant : Tell me if your mother had gone to Jungle or Lion came to your house !!
Blonde goes to chemist Anant.
"Give me medicine which will make penis limp for one month. And give me contraceptive medicine for one month.
Anant puzzled "will give you medicine. But tell me reason"
Blonde " I will be in Europe trip for one month "
One Liner Joke
A blonde buys a puzzle and takes it home.
After an hour she has none of it together, so she gets frustrated and calls her boyfriend Anant
She says " I just bought this puzzle, but i can't find any of the edges and none of the pieces fit together".
He asks her what is the picture supposed to be.
She says " a rooster".
He says " I'll be over in a minute to help you".
When Anant gets there he says "damn honey! put all those cornflakes back in the box!