Best Short Jokes This Year
Pilot: The plane is about to crash! Quick, make your last call to say your last words!
Guy: Babe, I'm so sorry, I cheated on you.
Pilot: Oops, nevermind, the plane is back in control!
Guy: CRASH THE FUCKING PLANE DAMMIT.
Dad: I want you to marry a girl of my choice
Dad: She's the daughter of Bill Gates
Son: Then okay
Dad goes to Bill Gates
Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son
Bill Gates: No
Dad: He is the CEO of the world bank
Bill Gates: Then okay
Dad goes to the president of world bank
Dad: Appoint my son the CEO of your bank
Dad: He's the son-in-law of Bill Gates
President: Then okay!
This is BUSINESS.
One day little Johnny is in his back yard digging a hole. His neighbor, seeing him there, decides to investigate. “Whatcha doin?” he asked.
Johnny replies, “My goldfish died and I`m burying him.”
“That`s an awful big hole for a goldfish, ain`t it?” asked the neighbor.
Johnny shot back, “That`s because he`s inside your fcukin` cat!!!