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Friend: Hey, have you got a date for Valentines Day?
Me: Yes, February 14.

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how do you make the concrete laughyou tickle its crack lol

Yesterday, I got high and went to Olive Garden. Waitress: Would you like soup or salad? Me: What t…Read More

Got arrested at the airport last week. Apparently, security doesn't appreciate it when you call "sho…Read More

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