Search for a category
why do midgets laugh while running through the yard?
The grass tickles their nuts
Whenever you get mad, just think of a t-rex trying to masturbate.
U R 6 C I 1 2 4 Q
Rate kickass if you get it !
Why name hurricanes lame names, like Sandy? Name that shit Hurricane Death Megatron 300 and I guarantee niggas be evacuating like they need to.
I named my hard drive "dat ass" so once a month my computer asks if I want to 'back dat ass up'.
Relationships are a lot like algebra.
Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
If a guy remembers the color of your eyes after the first date, chances are... you have small boobs.
If you force sex on a prostitute is it rape or shoplifting?
We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
I swear to drunk I'm not God, but seriously, stay in drugs, eat school, and don't do vegetables.
For once in my life, I'd like to get up in the morning and be as excited about it as my penis.
You haven't experienced awkward until you try to tickle someone who isn't ticklish
Olympic track makes you feel like you witnesed a crime, because you hear a gunshot and then see a bunch of black guys hauling ass.
Never get on one knee for a girl who won't get on two for you.
I am more pissed off than a dragon trying to blow out candles.
I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.
Accidentally pooped my pants in the elevator.I'm taking this shit to a whole new level.
Life without women would be a pain in the ass, literally.
You know you're ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.
Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.