Search for a category
The person who invented the door knock won the No-bell prize.
I couldn't work out how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.
Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.
When I get naked in the bathroom, the shower usually gets turned on.
People who say they suffer from constipation are full of shit.
It's not that the man didn't know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
Never trust atoms, they make up everything.
To the guy who invented Zero:
Thanks for nothing!
Enough with the cripple jokes!...I just can't stand them.
There are plenty of fish in the sea but until I catch one I'm just stuck here holding my rod...
Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.
I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory.All I did was take a day off.
When William joined the army he disliked the phrase 'fire at will'.
I was going to make a gay joke, butt f*ck it.
Is google a woman?
Because it won't let you finish your sentence without coming up with other suggestions.
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink
Say 'addicted' after everything I ask:What is someone who does drugs?What is someone who drinks?What hit you in the face last night?Addicted
There was a sign on the lawn at a drug re-hab center that said 'Keep off the Grass'.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.