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Best Comebacks Jokes of All Time

Funny Comeback

Police: Where do u live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With Me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbors house.
Police: Where is your neighbors house?
Me: You won't believe me if I tell you.
Police: Tell Me!
Me: Next to my house.

Funny Comeback

My friend: Your dick is probably like a tic tac.
Me: No wonder your moms mouth is so fresh.
Class: OOOOHHHHHH!!!

Funny Comeback

"Haha, you failed!"
"Yeah, so did your dad's condom."

Funny Comeback

Twinkle Twinkle little slut
Name a guy you haven't f*cked
Was he skinny, was he tall
Nevermind you did them all
Twinkle Twinkle little b*tch
Close your legs it smells like fish

Funny Comeback

Tough guy: I can't believe your still a Virgin! HAHAHAHA
Other Guy: I was a Virgin until last night
Tough guy: As if!
Other guy: Yeah man just ask your sister
Tough Guy: I don't have a sister???
Other Guy: You will in about 9 months

Funny Comeback

* nerds phone rings in class *
Cool Guy - awww, was that your mommy?
* whole class laughs *
Nerd Guy - nope, it was yours.
* whole class is silent *

Funny Comeback

Teacher- Did you do your homework?
Student - Did you grade my test?
Teacher - I have other students' tests to grade.
Student - I have other teachers' homework to do.
#LIKE A BOSS

Funny Comeback

Me: Mum i got a detention today
Mum: Why!
Me: Well the teacher pointed the ruler at me and said "at the end of this ruler is a idiot".
Mum: Yeah so
Me: I asked what end.

Funny Comeback

Girl: *stares at me for 30 sec*
Me: "What you looking at?"
Girl: " Idk, something ugly!"
Me: " BITCH, I ain't no mirror!"

Funny Comeback

Mom: Go clean your room!
Me: But its MY room.
Mom: And this is MY house.
Me: Then you go clean it.

Funny Comeback

Bully - "Hey fat ass. Why you so fat?"
Fat kid - "Because every time I f*ck ya mother she give me a cookie."

Funny Comeback

Boy texted his dad saying
Boy:I got expelled
Dad: WHAT WHY
Boy: cos we had this lesson about bulling and the teacher said sticks and stones may break my bone but words will never hurt me
Dad: and
Boy: so I threw a book at her face and it broke her nose
Dad : lol that's my boy

Funny Comeback

Teacher: Where the hell is your math homework?!
Me: it committed suicide, had too many problems.

Funny Comeback

Them: Bitch.
You: call me a b*tch again i dare you.
Them: Bitch
You: That's right b*tches do what their told.

Funny Comeback

Teacher: Why are you talking during my lesson?
Student: Why are you teaching during my conversation?

Funny Comeback

Teacher: Why are you here so early?
Student: Because my mom told me to go to Hell...

Funny Comeback

Roses are red. Violets are blue. God made us beautiful. What the f*ck happened to you?

Funny Comeback

Guy: FAIL!!
Me: no one asked you for your life story.

Funny Comeback

I hate it when ugly people say "I need my beauty sleep." Bitch you need to hibernate.

Funny Comeback

Police: Where do u live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With Me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbors house.
Police: Where is your neighbors house?
Me: You won't believe me if I tell you.
Police: Tell Me!
Me: Next to my house.
Police: Yay

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